Thursday, June 23, 2011

Bad Day Today Rant

Well my brother got married 6 years ago, and no one in the family liked her. My husband warned my brother that he was in for it. This woman came from a family of men haters. Her mother is in her late 60's and has never paid a bill, her 80 something grandmother pays all her bills.

Anyway, my brother wanted to have children, she did not. He was going to get a divorce because she is a very me oriented person and my brother wanted someone to love and for that someone to love him. He desperately wanted to be a Dad. So to keep stringing my brother along, she agreed to try and get pregnant. This stinging along went on for several years. Well (by accident) she got pregnant. It was horrible for my brother, and I say my brother because his wife had to go off her meds for mental well being she called it. Come to find out later, she failed to tell everyone she had a mental problem and had been in rehab for drug addiction.

Every little pain was a major event. Finally she had to have a c-section. Talk about the drama and the screaming about being in pain, my goodness, it was downright scripted from a movie scene, she should have won awards!!! Anyway, my one and only nephew was born on December 5th of 2008. He had to stay in the NICU because his lungs were having some issues. She got upset because no one brought her gifts, just the baby. She wasn't getting enough attention.

My aunt spent thousands of dollars on the state of the art equipment, breast pump, and everything she would need to have a comfortable nursery with all the items she could use. She breast fed for 3 months, I think. She stopped, not because of lack of milk, but because of vanity issues and it was too time consuming.

I offered to keep the baby for them because I wasn't working and she didn't like any of the day care centers they visited. They failed to get on any lists while she was pregnant. So I offered to do it for free for as long as they needed.

Dylan was a joy to have around and my 8 year old bonded with him. You can just see the love they have for each other. They act like siblings. Well she started to see how much time I spent with Dylan and my son Andrew, so she got persnickety that I was over stimulating my nephew and I could only hold him for so long and had to put him down for naps all the time. She also didn't like the idea that I was getting close to my nephew too.

Needless to say she settled for a day care center a good 20 - 30 minutes away from their home and refused any more help. We had to beg to see my nephew. Finally she decided she wanted to start doing roller derby because being a mom was too much to handle and she didn't have enough me time.

She asked if I would pick up Dylan from daycare on Wednesday and whenever she needed to work late. I said absolutely. Well I even tolerated the specific what to feed him rules. Only organic, not meat, and so on. The child was not being fed protein because she claims, she's vegan and doesn't want her baby to get fat.

This went on for several months, but when she showed up to take him home, he wouldn't want to go. I started to notice that she was rough in handling Dylan and lost her temper really quickly, so I would try and have him bathed and dressed for bed so she wouldn't have to struggle with him. I thought I was being helpful, but I was wrong.

Well it got to a point that I would have Dylan for most of the week, which I didn't mind. He became a regular at the table and we took him on errands, I went out and bought our own car seat and so on. Again she got jealous of the relationships he was forming with us. So she decided she didn't need me any more. I said okay and went on with life.

Any time they needed me to pick him up or watch him while they went out, I was there.

Monday night I get a frantic call from my brother that she had fallen at derby practice and hurt herself bad. She went to the ER and had sent him home because she didn't want the baby to be there. I offered to come get him and keep him over night so he could go back to the hospital and be with his wife, knowing their child would be safe and taken care of. We agreed I would keep him the rest of the week so she could heal and not have to worry about taking care of him.

Tuesday I get a call that they want me to bring Dylan home. Elie was uber pissed that I had kept Dylan and she had made arrangements for her mother to drive up from Norman (45 minutes South) to pick her and Dylan up so they could drop him off at daycare. I was only to pick him up from daycare and keep him until my brother got off work. okay no problem, whatever.

Today I get a text that says, Dylan has been dropped off at daycare, I can pick him up as early as I want, whatever works for me, just bring him straight home because she intentionally didn't leave a diaper bag, she was taking a pain pill and lying down. Okay again, whatever.

I sent her a text back later making sure I wasn't supposed to keep him until my brother got off, because she was on pain meds and no one was with her to take care of Dylan. She called me and said no, I can take care of it. I informed her that we were going to pick up Dylan around two, run some errands and bring him home. She said okay, I'm laying back down. I thought we were good to go!

I was so wrong! Let me stop here to interject some more tid bits. This woman has already been hateful to my parents and told them they were never to watch their grandchild alone, because they took medication. She also slammed my mother all over facebook for hearing a conversation between her and my brother, because he was still on the phone with my mother and hadn't been able to hang up. I try to be nice to her because she's married to my brother and that's the type of person I am. She does not get along with people at work, and was recently sent to mediation on her derby team for being unsportsman-like. So she is not a nice person in general.

Well we pick up Dylan at 2, go to Sam's club and shop for an hour, then Dylan said he's hungry. So we got him a slice of cheese pizza and a water. we then went to our house to put up the frozen food and I had to pee. While I was trying to finish my business my phone rings. When I was able to answer it, the first thing I get is,

"Where the Hell are you?"

I say, "We're at the house, I had to use the bathroom and put up the frozen food."

"Are you bringing Dylan home?"

"Yes in just a minute."

"Bring him the hell home now." and she hangs up on me.

At this point I'm livid. How rude do you need to be to someone going out of their way to help you?

We get Dylan changed and in the car. I'm so mad at this point I'm crying and shaking.
I call my brother to find out what's going on. Apparently she called the daycare to see when we checked him out. She was pissed he wan't home in the 15 minutes that she claims it took to drive from the center to their house. I relayed to my brother that I had discussed the time and things we had to do and when we would be dropping him off. When my brother informed me, it was my fault because I didn't call her when we left the daycare. I told him I had just spoken to her before we left my house. Well of course he took her side. I politely told him, you will have to find someone else to help you, because I do not under any circumstances deserve to be talked to like his wife talked to me. I respect the fact that she is his wife, but I do not deserve to be verbally abused.

Now completely broken down into tears because I'm so mad and heart broken that my brother would let his wife speak to me the way she did.

My husband, My Knight in Shining Armor, came to my rescue. He took my nephew to the door while he was screaming "I don't want to stay with mommy, I want to stay with you". She opened the door and proceeded to give my hubby the third degree. Where have you been, where did you go. He told her we went to Sam's Club and then got mad and said we don't have to answer to you. Yes you do, he's only 2.5" Baffled by the rant, my husband said, "you've won to lose!" She slammed the door in his face.

Now I won't get to see my nephew for a long time and I'm terrified she will hurt him or my brother. She's not mentally all there. Maybe her pain pills clouds her memory, but rudeness comes from the heart.

Sorry I had to vent. Everyone has bad days, just like every family has some bad blood. It just amazes me that people can be so uncaring and power hungry to treat people as inferiors. Well I blew my cap today and I think I like feeling the wind in my hair for a change!

Life's too short to hold a grudge, but I firmly believe in Karma and it's going to come around!

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